Tear Drops...

These couple of days have been just those kinda days when i'm struggling with who i am and the significance of my existence. Maybe it's because i've been unwell these past few days that have left me unable to do much so my mind is whirling into unknown recesses. Or maybe it's time to take a reality check; to be aware of that silver lining between things that are temporal and eternal. I don't know. But i didn't cry in the wake of my struggles...i've resolutely decided that i'm stronger than that, the day will pass and the phase will end. So instead i distracted my mind on the net. First i found some poetry to articulate my pensive mood. The Pains of Sleep by Samuel Taylor Coleridge, was a perfect articulation. But it was little help.

Then for some reason, began looking at old blog entries from some of you, my friends. Came to Cheryl's blog. I enjoy reading her blogs. Apart from being a good friend, she's a good writer - charismatic vulnerable,resolute and comical at the right moments. Well, was really just looking through, numb to my surroundings including a list of to-dos, when i came across an entry of hers posted last year April.

Last April, i was so privileged and blessed to be a part of her church's Easter production. Did new things, learnt new things. But in all the newness, it was also a time which caught me struggling with my mediocrity and insignificance. I always wondered, 'God, i did that play 'cos i love you and wanna do what i can do to point people to you. And you opened the door. But really any role i played that day...did it amount to anything at all?'

I found out the answer today. More than a year later, in a different setting but the same musings. Cheryl's entry (thank you Cheryl for sharing) wrote that two souls were saved, many more souls were seeded and God touched her with a glimpse of His love and compassion for us. So here now my tear drops are unlocked...not because i'm feeling insignificant anymore. But because God's great unfailing love and compassion has touched me. Reminding and assuring me that i am the pot and He is the potter. The potter may use us in normal insignificant circumstances...but who are we, the pots, to say to our Creator that we're insignificant. Our job is not to question Him, it's to trust Him.

Thank You so much, my Father. To say I love You now is an understatement.

God continue to bless and use you my friends...and may this song of the season help you to keep trusting Him...